As some of you may have heard, I lost my maternal grandfather, Neil Martin, Wednesday morning. He had been very ill for much of the past two years, so it wasn’t entirely unexpected. But death is never easy to deal with, no matter the circumstances.

We didn’t have a cuddly Hallmark-card relationship, but we still had a bond. I’m the oldest grandchild, and he and I connected in surprising ways.

My grandfather was a big-time foodie, a wine connoisseur and an excellent home cook. Many of my memories of him are food-related. Visiting his Worcester home nearly always meant kitchen time. I distinctly remember making ice cream, boiling sugar for caramel and tossing around pizza dough with him and his wife, Carol, my step-grandmother. Meals at their house were always something else. Big holiday dinners usually included some gourmet appetizers and a huge roast. He owned plenty of cookbooks and saved dozens of back issues of Gourmet magazine.

He and Carol had a house in Spruce Head, Maine, outside of Rockland. It’s a beautiful, sprawling property with stunning water views from the front porch. We spent many summer vacations there. It was where I ate my first lobster, at age eight. Life changed with that first bite.

I like to think my newfound shellfish obsession warmed his heart. After that summer, he tended to steer me toward seafood at holiday meals and special-occasion dinners, and he always made sure I had plenty of helpings of his killer seafood Newburg recipe.

I started Fun With Carbs and my freelance food writing career around the time his health really started to slide. But to his credit, he really kept up with my blog and always asked about my latest articles and projects. He was also a big current events buff, so I think he liked the fact that I’d gone into journalism.

My last meal with him was Thanksgiving. We had dinner at Maxwell Silverman’s, a busy restaurant in Worcester. He and Carol were having wine; his red, hers white. (No one else in my family really drinks wine.)

I asked him how he liked his glass of Cabernet. He made a face. “It tastes like it just came out of the icebox,” he said.”Try it.”

I immediately assumed it was a typical petty complaint. But after one sip, I realized he was exactly right – the wine had likely been stored in the fridge. “You’re right, Grandpa,” I said. “That is so wrong.”

He smiled. He knew I got it.

Rest in peace, Grandpa Neil. Thank you for helping me become a foodie.

They look so innocent, but they start culture wars.

I’m assuming most of my blog readers are New Englanders. If so, then hopefully you’ll agree with me on this one.

Is it ever proper to help yourself to your dining neighbors’ dishes? At any point during the meal?

Let me back up a bit. When we booked our flights and hotels in Sonoma and Napa, we also booked a Saturday night reservation at Thomas Keller’s Ad Hoc, the celebrity chef’s casual bistro in Yountville. Five weeks went by – during which I devoured every “du jour” four-course dinner menu that arrived in my email inbox. (The restaurant serves a set family-style menu every night, which is so notorious that some diners choose to be “surprised” when they arrive for their seating.) We even dressed up a bit, though wine country is very casual. Bottom line: I was incredibly excited for this dining experience.

We were placed at a corner table, but practically on top of another couple, both who looked to be in their early fifties. If there’s one thing I hate while dining out, it’s close-proximity seating. And if it were any run-of-the-mill local restaurant, I’d ask to be moved. But I wasn’t about to do that at Ad Hoc.

It became clear that the couple next to us was VERY intoxicated. They were sharing a bottle of wine (who knows how many they’d had at that point) and practically shouting at each other across the table. The man in the couple was trying to sound philosophical, and we all know how attractive that is when someone’s drunk. And every time the woman glanced at her menu, he would snap, “Listen to me! Are you listening to me?” I happened to look down and realized he had also removed his shoes.

They were so obnoxious that even Rob noticed. And since we were half an elbow’s length from these people, we couldn’t talk about it. This is where BlackBerry Instant Messenger comes in very handy. Me: “These people are fucking morons.” Rob: “I think the toolbags are leaving soon.”

We did our best to ignore them. But as our waiter ran down the evening’s menu, they piped up with their own commentary of everything they’d eaten so far. Fine, whatever.

The salad came. It was a work of art, with roasted beets, endive and bright citrus fruit. I took a picture, since this is what I do. The woman leaned over and slur-screeched, “Are youuuu a fooooood styliiiiisst?” I gave her a tight smile and said no, hoping to be abrupt enough to discourage future conversation.

Our “add-on” dish, mussels in a saffron-mustard cream, came before the entree. The dish was fantastic: plump, succulent mussels cooked to a melt-in-your-mouth consistency. The sauce was velvety but kind of heavy, and we wanted to make sure we saved room for the rest of our meal. So we put the plate off to the side. This apparently incensed our wine-soaked table neighbor, who proceeded to rant at us for not eating “the amazing sauce.” “If you don’t want it, I’ll take it,” she slurred. “I’ll eat your sauce!”

We got through our entree – grilled flatiron steak – without incident. But as the waiter came to clear our plates, she stopped him in his tracks. “You’re not allowed to take that,” she said. “They don’t want their sauce! I’m taking their sauce!” Then she reached across to our table and snatched the plate of mussel sauce, practically licking it clean.

I looked at Rob, horrified. The woman’s companion laughed loudly. “It’s a family-style restaurant!” he said in response to our shocked faces. “Welcome to California!”

If this is California, I thought to myself, then fly me right back to Connecticut.

Look, I know we New Englanders have a bad (but sometimes deserved) reputation for being cold or unfriendly. We aren’t the type to strike up conversations with strangers in elevators, say hello to people we don’t know from Adam, or even slow to let another driver merge on the highway. But I don’t think you have to be from the Northeast to be creeped out by a neighboring diner taking your food from your table. All personality debates aside – it’s rude, it’s unsanitary and it’s downright disgusting.

We met some of the nicest, most relaxed people in Napa and Sonoma. They were warm, earnest, helpful, knowledgeable and genuinely happy to make your acquaintance. That was one of the best parts of our trip. And without the countless bottles of wine, maybe these people would have been equally cool. We’ll never know.

Our time at Ad Hoc was wonderful. The food, service and atmosphere were quite enjoyable. But I’ll always remember that night in Yountville as the “Unfortunate Mussels Incident.”

Today, I’m featured as the “Friday Foodie” over at Travel, Wine and Dine, a popular Boston-based food and wine blog authored by Meghan Malloy. Check it out.

Meghan is part of an incredibly active and passionate cadre of Boston food bloggers, several of whom I have met on Twitter. They gather regularly for dinners, cocktail parties, events and festivals, something we’ve tried to do on a smaller scale here in Connecticut.

(Which is hard, when some of us live three or four counties away from each other. But we make it work!)

Meghan has also traveled to California wine country on many occasions, and recently sent me an excellent email full of tips and recommendations for my trip that is JUST SIX DAYS AWAY. If I can just get through the TSA checkpoints without causing a national incident…

If you’ve come over here from Travel, Wine and Dine, welcome! Drop me a line and say hi. I love hearing from new people.

My humble little carbohydrate-loving blog officially turns one year old today, marking not only the first anniversary of my foray into the food-blogging world, but also the day I became a freelance writer.

I left my full-time webstaff job at the Hartford Courant on Oct. 28, 2009, with visions of supporting myself through the written word. It was a decision few understood. After all, I had relative job security (as secure as a job can be in the news industry) and a salary with benefits at a time when unemployment had hit record highs. But I also had dreams, and I felt my writing skills were languishing. (Headlines don’t count. When I worked the breaking news shifts on courant.com, our running joke was that we only needed a save-get key for morning stories. “Shooting in Hartford.” “Carjacking in Hartford.” “Stabbing in Hartford.”)

I also had an idea to start a food blog, figuring I could chronicle my dining experiences and cooking adventures while sharpening my writing. After all, I hadn’t had a full-time writing job since 2005. And that’s where my mentor and savior Jeanne Leblanc came in. Self-employed as a web consultant after leaving the Courant herself in 2009, she offered to build me a site as a wedding present. She is responsible for the design, structure, back-end HTML and functionality of Fun With Carbs (not to mention those flowing red wine and delicious baguette images), and I can’t thank her enough for her hard work, talent and support. More than just technical assistance, Jeanne provided a listening ear and a steady stream of good humor as I started out on my own. Everyone should have that kind of backup when they’re making a life-changing decision.

Fun With Carbs opened more doors for me than I thought possible. Within a few months, I had been asked to help judge a culinary competition at UConn, gained press access to the Mohegan Sun WineFest and caught the attention of Five Guys Burgers and Fries with a quick post about our visit to their Worcester location.

Not only was it tremendously fun, but it helped prove that I could write. Even though I’d worked for the Courant for more than three years, my editor colleagues knew me as a web producer, the person they could come to for help with online story placement, photo galleries and multimedia extras. Now they knew I had chops as a writer, and began to call on me for more assignments.

I published features on “foodie” couples and restaurants’ use of social media in the Courant, making invaluable contacts along the way – media professionals and fellow Connecticut gourmands that I still speak to regularly. This list of excellent people only grew when I did another feature on local food bloggers. I now have even more friends that I can text or email to share news of an upcoming event, a must-try restaurant dish or a successful recipe. It’s a great feeling.

Most importantly, my independent attempt at food writing led to the two steady professional gigs I enjoy most today: the A La Carte blog for the Courant / CTNow.com and my biweekly contributions to the A La Carte restaurant column in the Courant’s Flavor section. Through these avenues, I’ve met some of the state’s most passionate and gifted chefs and restaurateurs (and eaten some knock-your-socks-off meals along the way.) I’ve also had the opportunity to attend culinary events like the Taste of the Nation in Hartford and the upcoming Foxwoods Food & Wine Festival. Oh, and do you remember when I interviewed Anthony Bourdain?

I’ve had a hell of a year and I can’t wait to see what comes next. There are so many people to thank for their support – my phenomenal husband Rob (we were only one month into marriage when this all began,) my parents and family; my great friends, my former Courant buddies who’ve stayed in regular touch and advocated for me for assignments; my generous editors in the Features department; my fellow bloggers for their inspiration, guidance and innovation and so many more.

Happy Birthday, Fun With Carbs. I think you deserve a Funfetti cake.

(Photo credit: Wikimedia Commons)

Credit: Travel Channel

At the risk of sounding supremely uncool, I’d like to share my first celebrity interview with the class.

Q&A: Anthony Bourdain

Bourdain is doing a speaking engagement in Springfield next Friday and back in June, I requested press access to cover it. His management asked if I’d like to do an interview. Um, okay.

I’m happy with the way it turned out – he was thoughtful and witty and of course injected some of his characteristic salty phrasing into his responses. (One of the lines didn’t make it into print. Ha.)

For all you food bloggers out there, this quote’s for you. “Those complaining about the power shift from conventional print media, particularly as it relates to food and restaurants…it’s like people complaining that Dylan went electric. I mean, they sound like idiots now.”

I’ll be at the event next weekend. Especially excited now.